I am not functioning well today. I am doing things...I guess that's functioning? I Deposited some checks..and paid my property taxes. They were late. I didn't think it would be a big deal. I was going to file my taxes, and then pay my property taxes with the return. But then I got a nice friendly letter from Wachovia telling me that if I did not pay my property taxes in full and get them proof by today, that one or all of the following actions may be taken: they may advance funds to pay the taxes, in the future my property taxes would be a part of my monthly mortgage payment...(which would be like sudden death to me since I can barely pay this amount!), and the most lovely threat of all...foreclosure. E-gads! I called and spoke to someone there...she noted the file that I was going to pay with my return...but then when I asked her how long I had to do that...she said there isn't exactly a date here...She couldn't tell me how long I had. So I got nervous because of that. I think the fact that the JC bought the house behind mine, tore it down, and is now paving a parking lot (TODAY!)...added to the pressure I was feeling about this. So I toddled on down to the tax accessors office and paid my taxes. Even though I will now be short for some other very important bills...and I don't know how I'm going to do this all? I am freaking out. I also went to my property today and met with the code inspector (fun). We walked through the duplex and it turns out the only thing I have to fix is ONE stupid little plug. It works but the little safety button doesn't shut off the plug when it should. (Lame). I can fix that. It's not that big of a deal. At one point the manic tenant tried hi-fiving me and saying "teamwork". I did not respond. I hate her. She's the one who broke the stupid smoke alarms and called the code inspector on me in the first place. I hate my tenants. I hate that neighborhood. I am glad that the city is trying to fix it up. But I wish they would leave me alone. I hate having to deal with that stress on top of everything else! God...some moments I feel like I'm going to pop. My heart flutters. (I don't think that's a good thing.) I can't sleep. I am just so tired of my life. It's so hard. I took my mom for a walk today. She fell on the steps and hurt her knee. I don't know how I am going to do everything. I wish I could just be home with my mom. Fuck the rest of the world.
melancholy
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