I'm Getting Married In The Morning...Ding Dong The Bells Are Going To Chime!

• Mar. 10th, 2008 at 9:43 PM

 I feel tired. Lately I find myself reaching for things that may or may not be rewarding. Men in particular. I hate that feeling. The dread of risk. One is a friend that I miss. And though I've done nothing to contact him. He's been in my thoughts. Haunting me. I wish I could have him in my life again. I miss him. Or I want to forget him and never think of him again. One or the other. The timing doesn't seem right though.
...And Joshua. Only last week he kept calling me and writing me. We had some marathon talks. But now...he hasn't the time or inclination (it feels like)...and I want to connect.
After reading Olivia's post about rings..and looking at some of them...I had a strange thought. Perhaps I should marry myself. Stop waiting for the man. Just marry myself. Commit to me. Basically take a solemn vow to be my best friend, my biggest fan, my greatest advocate....someone who will always love me, and be there for me...through thick and thin...no matter what..no matter how badly I behave...to always be good to myself, love me, and have faith and confidence in me. I don't suppose I'll get any wedding gifts though?...no. Probably not. ;-)

• 
  
• 
  
• 
  
• 
  
• 
  
• Mood:  blah

• 1 comment
• Leave a comment
• Edit Entry
• Edit Tags
• Add to Memories
• Track This
• Link