I cannot believe that I have spent the whole evening blabbing away with said wonderful boy! --Again! We do this all the time now. And yet life is not completely sure and clear to me. Sometimes I wish he would just make clear declarative statements erring on the overenthusiastic. He does...particularly for him...he's very shy...so the fact that he EVEN TOLD ME that he liked me was huge and different behavior for him. And he has told me that he does like me waaaaay more than anyone else..and waaay more than anyone else he's liked in a long long time...We're talking years here! So...That is very cool. But I yearn to hear him say...I love you..weather or not you return the sentiment...I LOVE YOU! And then I want him to get specific about all of the things about ME in particular that he loves...I want him to risk everything. I'm sick of being the girl who risks her heart for love...Too bad he didn't meet me before Joshua...I think I'd make this whole thing much easier for him then...Back then I had never really been hurt before. Never really had a broken heart. So I was so much more open, and free, and vulnerable. This is the guy who deserves that openness. He is (hopefully) the kind of guy who would be a good steward of that trust. We shall see. But so far...he's amazing. He even likes things about me that I never expected a guy to ever like...He actually told me last night..that he liked the time I reminded him to be compassionate to a person he didn't like! That is something that I would expect from a girl but not a boy. He said that it was the kind of quality that he wanted in a romantic relationship..he also listed a bunch of other ones...which we talked about in depth...but that one stood out to me because it was such a surprise...And something that I'm actually glad he was open to and appreciative of. He's amazing. Did I mention he's amazing? And he calls me his little artichoke! I love that! He's even talked openly about our future...just comparing notes here to see if we're really compatable..I've never had a guy who seriously and early into it wanted to do that. He wants me to meet his mom. Last night he talked about moving to where I go..if I ever went far away for school. By the by...I have known him for a while so he's not some creepy obsessive type...I am just totally blown away by how wonderful he is. I can't believe how wonderful he is... I am exausted! And I have class in a few hours. Blah! Love is hell on the sleeping schedule! Just for school alone it seems preferable to be single while in college. You get more sleep...you never have anything (excitement, broken hearts, lovers quarrells) keeping you up at night or distracting you from your classes.
loved
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