Things That I Will Probably Never Say

January 5th, 2009; 11:58 PM

Current mood:lonely

I wanted to talk with you tonight. I had a small window of opportunity, shortly after work, before ladies night, and while I was *not* on the highway (because I know how much you hate to talk with me while I'm driving -the sound of the freeway is annoying I agree.) I called you while I waited in line at the drive through prescription window at Walgreens. Or is it Wallgreens?? Whatever that place is called...I called you from there. It was probably too soon for you. My guess is that you were most likely still in your gear, or just getting home and cleaning up. Or resting. I know how you usually need to unwind after work and like to take a nap. It was the only time I had available in the window of acceptable times to call (between 5 and 8 PM). Oh well. I wish you would just call me. Right now. You're probably still pissed off at me. In which case, it's probably for the best that we do not speak. You've never been good at making peace and getting down to loving. You like to stay rummy. When you get in a pissy mood, you like to hang out there for a good while. I hate that about you. I wish you could just talk, focus on harmonious communication, work things out well, and then love. I miss your love. I wish I could hear your warm, deep, relaxed and friendly voice right now. Instead I have the I'm pissed off at you silent treatment. The I want you to "meditate" on what you've done wrong treatment. Word MF? The term "MEDITATE" has nothing to do with ruminating over all of the things that you hate about me. Nor is it a *healthy* or even *nice* thing to do, to try to force someone to beat them self up mentally and hate themself as much as you hate them. SO...I PASS on that invite. I am Russia. I veto. However, if you want to have a heartfelt dialogue I am totally game. I love you very much. And if it pisses you off that I won't join you in the misery then oh well. I hope you join me over here soon though. Because yet again. I do love you very much.