Kids Are The Best Birth Control Ever!

May 15th, 2008; 10:17 PM

Current mood:pensive

I may be crazy. I don't know how this happened. It seemed like a good and a bad idea at first glance. Actually at first glance, I ruled it out because I couldn't imagine it being a workable deal for my mom. Aidan is such a little cootie catcher, his hands are almost always dirty, and my mom has no immune system...so it seemed like something I couldn't do. I can't put my mom at risk to help my friend and her son. Even though I totaly want to. I want to help her. I do. I also am so tempted by the thought of someone who can help me watch my mom. I would love to be able to go away for the weekend and go backpacking this summer. It seemed like an idea with such possibilities. I could help her watch Aidan, and she could help me get my house in order and life in order. It wouldn't necissarily have to be for a long term. And she could also help watch my mom. She needs a home. I need a renter. We both know eachother. I know that she would help me alot. I just also spend roughly 3 or 4 hours with her and her son, and he stressed me out during that period. He actually gave me a headache. He yells all the time, to the point where if you ask him to use his indoor voice, he still yells. (That *is* his indoor voice!) He's amazingly destructive, everything from kicking signs, hitting people, ripping things like paper in the back seat where he sits, shaking trees, breaking off branches from the neighbors trees, and banging his toys together constantly for 5 minutes while we are driving in the car. He has a constant need for attention, so a conversation is almost impossible. He's always interrupting, yelling over you, being rude, trying to get attention at all costs, and if he's asked to wait, he will go break something or hurt himself to get attention. It's stressful. I fucking don't want kids if they turn out like that. No way. Send 'em back! ...On the other hand, Aidan *can be* very sweet. He just seriosly needs to go through a period of breaking in with rules, and structure, and consequenses that are very predictable for his actions. EVERY TIME. Not just some of the time. EVERY TIME he throws a temper tantrum, he should get a time out. He also needs a routine. He needs to be tuckered out during the day, he needs to be with other children: learning and playing. He also needs more concentrated attention from his mom, so that he isn't always so attention starved. He really needs his needs to be fullfilled there. He also needs a bedtime routine. So he's actually in bed and on his way to being asleep by 8 PM. He's only 4. 8 PM is a fine bedtime for him. I think my bedtime was 8 until I was 9 years old! If he had all of this. He would be a much nicer child to be around. There are just so many things that he doesn't know how to do. He is really good at throwing temper tantrums, pouting, yelling, and being destructive in general. He needs to learn how to be gentle, how to lower his energy at night and know how to have quiet time. He also needs to learn how to play with his toys...like actually entertain himself and be creative. I used to do it. He is so used to being passive when it comes to entertaining himself. He watches TV. and videos, or he has to have *you* entertain him...(which is great some of the time. Playing with kids is fun and is good for him...)...But he also has to be able to use his own creativity in a good way...and be able to use his imagination and play nicely with himself. He seriosly has a hard time with this. So when I came home, I saw my mom. And I realized that she needs peace. One of the most important things she needs now is peace and quiet. Colds aside...she needs a tranquil environment for her own well being. And even if it's messy...that's better than clean and violent. So I called Bree and told her my concerns. I appologised. We only entertained the idea for a few hours...I'm still thinking that having her here for a short while..like a month or two...might still be a good idea. I'm not sure. Aidan HAS to be under control though. I gauruntee, he would not like it for the first week. It's not that I wouldn't want him to like it...I just know that the first week would be hell. I would have rules...like bath and bedtime...and no bedtime stories unless you behave like a good little boy (aka. no temper tantrums), but if you do behave...we can have 30 minutes of stories. I also wouldn't debate a lot of things with him. If he asks for 4 candies, and I say he can have one, but he persists in asking for more, or throws a fit (tactics that have always been successful in the past for him), I will not give in. I think it would be the holy reign of terror from him. I would have much more in the rules department than he is used to. Plus he wouldn't get to throw a temper tantrum to get his way with me. I would just put him in time out until he calms down. I don't think he would like it. I'm not as fun as his mom.