Day Under The Oaks

May 5th, 2008; 12:04 AM
Current mood:loved

I went to Day Under The Oaks today with my mom. It was good. We caught the last bits of it. She was so game to go. I asked her, and she just had to go to the bathroom, then we were off. She even walked pretty fast the first block. I wasn't sure about it. I didn't want her to fall. But then I relaxed a bit and decided to let her do it herself. She did run her walker off the sidewalk on one corner, but caught herself before she fell. (We slowed down after that.) But still, it was neat to see her trying so hard. I didn't want to discourage her efforts.

We saw some Pomo indian dancers at the event. Honestly the indian dancers are about all that I remember of Day Under The Oaks as a child. It's always been one of my favorite things about it. We went, and watched. There was one little boy about 2 or 3 years old, who was dancing with the mens group. And he was usually the last dancer to come in. It was fun watching them. The little dancer was my favorite. Afterwards, we came home and relaxed for a bit. I am glad I got to do something fun today with my mom.

I had a few heavy moments today, where I should have been fine...but they were still heavy for me. Little things like when we came home and were in front of our house, my mom asked me if we should "turn right here?" That choked me up a bit. It's hard for me, when I see that simple things like where we live are things that she is uncertain of. She doesn't fully know what to do..but she has an inclination. Like a faded memory. I hugged her inside. We had a good long hug. And we agreed that death is inevitable. We all die at some point. That is inescapable. The most important part is *how we live*. So, I am trying to keep that in the forefront of my thoughts. To not be so down and heavy. And to keep my focus on the good stuff.